The thing about scams

I've been cheated.

The Ol' Canadian Coin Switch Up strikes again.

Yes, being from the Midwest this has been a startling new discovery. It turns out that many Western New Yorkers are familiar with this scam.

A cashier hands you some change, and you, the trusting individual, simply eyeball the coins. You walk out of the bank, store, restaurant, gas station etc. none the wiser.

It isn't until you need that nickel or empty your pockets that you discover that what you thought was an American quarter is actually a Canadian quarter and what you thought was a shiny American nickel is actually a Canadian nickel. (The picture above is a mix of Canadian and American coins, can you tell the difference?)

At this point one's ethics comes into play: do you pass the coin forward and hope no one notices (as so unfortunately happened to you) or do you cut your losses and hold on to it for your next trip across the border?

I've opted for the latter, but it still kind of bugs me. It's pocket change I admit, but after some rather unscientific polling in line at the post office today, it sounds like banks, restaurants and other legit entities have been known to pass on the tender as fraudulent American money.

I would like to believe that it's all exchanged in error and that people are simply passing on the same mistake, but the buck has to stop somewhere. No pun intended.

No doubt the proximity to Canada brings the coins into circulation in America on a daily basis (and vice versa,) but the ones who lose out are those of us who aren't border hopping regularly .

I'm losing about 6 cents to the American dollar for every nickel and quarter of mine that turns into Canadian money and that's not even taking into consideration the very unlikely possibility that I'll use these coins in Canada any time soon.

So I'll be more vigilant, but you should too, Mr. ClerkWhoGivesMeCanadianMoneyinAmerica.

Besides, I really need those quarters for the laundromat and the washers and dryers CAN tell the difference.

The thing about names

I had a conversation with a gentleman Saturday who kept referring to me by the wrong name. The entire time. On the awkward spectrum, this ranks fairly high because both parties involved can easily become embarrassed if the truth is revealed.

For his purposes, I was "Barbara." To be sure, NOT my name, not even a very pretty name (no offense Barbaras.) Not once, not twice, at least five times he referred to me as such. I could have corrected him, but by the time I realized his error was not actually an allusion to another woman, it was too late.

I was Barbara. I felt bad correcting him so late in the game, even though we had just become acquainted half an hour earlier. His mistake, so why should I be embarrassed? Good question.

I reasoned he associated my last name with a famous Barbara of a similar last name and thus when searching for my first name when memory failed, he remembered my memorable last name and went for the familiarity point.

What kills me is how someone can manage to say your name that many times in a conversation. Not only say it, but say it wrong.

Perhaps I'm unusual, but I rarely say someone's name while conversing with them. In fact, if I even slightly doubt my name recollection, I will entirely avoid naming names all together.

Think about it:

"Hey, how are you?...So how's work at such and such...Have you ever gone grocery shopping at Wegman's? Oh really, they sell pickled pigs feet?" That sort of thing.

No need for first names. That's not saying you have to be impersonal, but practical.

When in doubt, my name isn't Barbara and you don't ever have to reference me when we're already speaking face to face.

Ok, John? or was it Ralph?

The thing about learning a foreign language

Last night my boyfriend got some disturbing news.

He was busy grading his students' Spanish compositions, which keep him abnormally busy as they are usually riddled with grammatical errors, when one student's composition revealed a startling detail about her dog.

"Mi perro Jack tiene dos anos."
translation: My dog Jack has two anuses.

She was likely going for "My dog Jack is 2 years old" but leaving the ˜ off the ñ sure makes for a fun read. Luckily she followed it up with,

"Mi otro perro solo tiene un ano"
translation: My other dog only has one anus.


Español 101
ano = anus
año = year

Good to know.